Stay tuned folks! Here we will talk about privacy, Facebook and swingers clubs.
We live in a funny time: people talk about privacy and in the same time ready to give their email passwords just to be featured on tv:
There are opinion that golden era of privacy is finished and it was XX century. Our parents told us not to talk to strangers, but now we are happy to share our location, details of what we do and with whom at Facebook and Instagram.
Today I want to share my thoughts on modern sexuality. Everybody knows Tinder – the app, where you share your location to strangers in hope of find sex or relationships. But Tinder is nothing in compare to growing popularity of swingers, bdsm, so called kinky people and polyamory people.
Swingers clubs number by continents
I took a look at http://allswingersclubs.org/analytics.html . What I discovered surprised me: some countries host hundreds of official swingers clubs! But I was so naive, coz later I discovered http://fetlife.com/ – the bottom part of iceberg with tons of local and niched groups on any kind of so called alternative sex. Demand on having sexual experiences with strangers is huge.
RoseWould Plantation Sex & Swingers Club @ Second Life
Even kids oriented virtual world Roblox has issues related to wish to have sexual activities with strangers. Of course they don’t have swingers clubs there, or sex rooms, like some Second Life places . But Roblox definitely have shocking issues related to sex (sex room issue, gang rape issue – it’s became meme).
And I can guess that it’s not only problem related to the adult child predator lurking into the game but big change in the world and new generations. Younger gens don’t value privacy anymore. And examples with sexual life are the great indicator of this.
The x-rated club is where the rich and famous go to fulfill their sexual fantasies far away from prying eyes as all phones are banned.
Discretion is key as politicians, musicians and the city’s millionaires are all said to visit the club, which is just yards from the iconic Louvre museum.
It is run by Valérie Hervo – known to all as ‘Madame Valérie’ – who until now has kept quiet about what goes on inside the “porno chic temple”.
“It’s a universe of pleasures,” she writes in her new memoir Les Dessous des Chandelles.
“Sex is just the cherry on the cake … I get drunk just on the atmosphere.”
However, it turns out that pleasure doesn’t come cheap as the cost of entry is a stiff £270 per couple.
That price includes dinner and champagne – which are both really just starters to what comes next.
“During these feasts an erotic tension spreads, soft and delicious,” reveals Hervo.
“Tongues loosen little by little, the conversation becomes bolder, the glances more direct, the touching less innocent.”
The fun then moves to the “horizontal salons” – rooms with mattresses where unlimited condoms are supplied free of charge.
These rooms are filled with dark alcoves where couples can strip naked to romp while others join in or just sit back and enjoy the show.
There’s men-on-women and women-on-women, and bodies blur into a writhing, sighing mass.
Downstairs in the basement, toys and chains are attached to the walls for those feeling extra-playful.
The age demographic differs drastically for men and women.
Most monsieurs are over 40 with some well into their sixties, while mademoiselles are younger, in their late twenties and thirties.
But it’s definitely not a pickup joint and singles are not even allowed in the inconspicuous front door.
If you and your partner are lucky enough to find an inviting hand on one of your arms, then you join in the fun.
However, no one forces you to do anything and you can stand and watch all night or just sit at the bar and drink in the view.
“It’s not threesomes,” one regular said. “It’s x-somes. Meaning as many as you want.”
Despite the club’s laid back attitude to sex, it does have a few strict rules as Mick Jagger reportedly found out.
It’s said the Rolling Stones star was once turned away after rocking up in jeans and trainers.
“That’s an outfit for chopping wood,” Hervo apparently said later.
And she reveals she is not the only woman in charge inside the notorious sex club.
“Les Chandelles is a place where the woman decides, it’s the woman who is in command,” writes Hervo.
“She should not be a trophy for exhibition or booty to be shared but a goddess to be honoured, adored.
“She should dominate, imposing her desires and whims.”
The club has dozens of regulars and for some it has become a real family affair.
One couple revealed they put a notice on the fridge at home indicating what days they are going to the club just so they don’t bump into their daughter – also a regular.
One day a man arrived with his mistress, telling Hervo that his wife was in bed at home with a temperature.
An hour later the wife arrived with a boyfriend, urging Hervo not to mention her visit the next time she came with her husband.
Hervo quickly went next door to alert the husband, discreetly leading him to flee out of the emergency exit.
Other visitors to the club have given in rave reviews on Yelp.
One called I Love C wrote: “If you are clean, well dressed and attractive you will get in. No phones or cameras allowed downstairs. They do make you check everything in!
“This is the classiest sex club in Paris and maybe even one of the best in the entire world. My partner and I went two nights in a row. Inside the lighting is so elegant and sexy and the decor is beautiful and legit.
“The music/dj plays very sexy music. There were three different play rooms and two poles…which were very fun to dance on in my flowing dress.
“There was plenty of room sit and relax, watch or just cuddle up with your special friend……or new friend.”
As you can see if you are searching the term on Google, swinging is a non-monogamous lifestyle in which both partners (married or not) are engaging in sexual activities with other (another couple or multiple couple or threesomes), with the full knowledge of their spouse/partner. Also, swinging is a form of open relationship and it has a recreational purpose.
Hey it’s so amazing how things dramatically changed from dirty secrets of crazy perverts to “me and my partner are visiting swingers clubs to heal our marriage”. If you google “swingers clubs” in first 30 results you will find Vice.com, Thrillist, TimeOut NY. We live in an interesting time, my dear readers!
Friends don’t let friends have boring sex — at least not friends (or even strangers) in Portland. Two examples: the city’s swingers clubs and Kinkfest.
Porn star Ron Jeremy’s Portland swingers hangout, Club Sesso, shut in 2015, but the city’s sex scene get right on rolling. Pointed out Willamette Week’s sex writer last year: “Portland is a very sexy town, with several venues for public sex shenanigans.”
The website seems to perpetually have “Sold Out” stamped across its splash page. Kinkfest, organizers point out, is “an annual, 3-day event celebrating sexual diversity, bdsm, fetish and leather communities.” That means workshops, lectures, merchandise — and “evening play parties.”
People tend to not be bored by the sight of other people naked. Which means they don’t have much chance to be bored in Portland — at least not during the warm months. Three examples: The World Naked Bike Ride, Portland’s plethora of strip clubs, and Sauvie Island’s nude beach.
Even the most boring towns in the country have strip clubs. But a vampire-themed vegan one? Or one that offers “stripperoke” — a twist on karaoke that has strippers doffing their clothes to the sound of customers’ off-key stylings? Or a club that serves as home base for an intellectual stripper who’s the subject of a feature-length documentary? No, those are only in Portland.
Sauvie Island nude beach
A one-mile beach on the northwest side of the island is for truly unfettered sun worshippers. Notes The Oregonian’s Jamie Hale: “The area is connected to the non-nude North Unit Beach, so be wary of gawkers and people who might be offended by your nudity.”
The World Naked Bike Ride
Portland isn’t the only place where organized naked rides happens, but the Rose City embraces it like no other burgh.
Hey, let’s continue our sexual series! Today I want to raise the subject of sex therapy, healing tantric sex, therapy by swinging, practicing BDSM or opening up to polyamory. I see articles and videos on this subject everywhere now. Sex is became normal part of our life, we are became adults who not starting to laugh and course when talk about sex starts.
Scientists are got tons of evidence about benefits of sex. Now I would not sum it up – it’s subject for big series of articles. Sex is healthy in a short. Healthier than walk at the nature, balanced whole food and physical exercises.
So idea of sex as a therapy in open to sex society is an obvious one.
Prescribed sex for disabled people
Of course the most obvious is idea to prescribe sex to those who have lack of sex – disabled ones, elder ones, those who has sexual traumas or simply low self esteem because of traumatic childhood/youth. Look at this great Vice reportage on sex for disabled ones:
Spiritual healing sex
Another kind of sexual therapy – is so called spiritual sex. As for me it’s a quite controversial workaround of sexual guilt. People believe into some ancient Indian magic to avoid sexual guilt and shame. Ok, it’s works at least. But trough huge system of lie. Maybe you heard latest news about sexual abuse in Agama Yoga school tantric community. And, how most of observers said, it’s not the first and not the last case in tantric schools.
Sexual counseling and more common sex practices
More healthy way (as for me) is kind of psychological counseling related to sex. Psychologist just lead you or you and your partner and recommend some ways to improve your life, the whole one and the sexual one. It’s an non-intrusive way which taking into account your personality, your level of self-development, your temperament and what you like.
For example such counselor can introduce you to swinging or BDSM or polyamory. She can give you resources – books, websites, online and offline groups. If you feel comfortable with some of such culture she can recommend you to attend some event – cuddling poly jam, or BDSM dungeon or swingers club.
Of course, it’s just several examples of sexual therapy and not the full list. In later posts I will talk about other ones.
Articles are written in a friendly manner encouraging couples to safely try swinging by going to some sex club. Looks like something changed in the world. Thing which was alternative, counter culture, popular at underground libertarian groups, becoming mainstream.
Watch this introducing videos if you interested into this growing trend:
Not much blogging has been done here for a while. I do write occasionally over at Samizdata, mostly about economics, technology and occasionally science fiction. My best post ever is still the one about maps and territory.
When I attempted to upgrade my old Rackspace server to Ubuntu 12.04 I found some incompatibility between syslogd and the kernel that cause syslogd to use all the CPU resources all the time. That is how I discovered that I was using a Rackspace-provided kernel instead of the Ubuntu one.
So after finding the problem difficult to fix I discovered that Rackspace are renting new OpenStack based servers and I could get more memory and disk space for about the same money. I’ve also organised this new server a bit better, for instance by using etckeeper, and kept better notes.
Why bother with a virtual server at all when a simple web host would be cheaper and easier to maintain? Good question. This way I get to play at running my own server, and also install obscure software on it and play with ssh tunnelling and permanently connected IRC clients. In other words it is mainly for my own amusement. I wouldn’t recommend it if all you want is a server to run WordPress on.
My dad has expressed an interest in smartphones, but he doesn’t want to spend much money. In theory this is possible.
The trouble with budget Android phones is that a typical user is likely to be less tech savvy. People like me are happy to shell out large sums of money for the best devices. But low end users are less likely than tech savvy users to be able to cope with the drawbacks of current budget devices. These tend to be slow, laggy and stuttery, and have small screens, inadequate displays and less than responsive touch screens. All these things confuse non-tech savvy users because their mental model of the phone does not include invisible, behind the scenes processing. Tap an icon and nothing happens? The natural thing to assume is “I did something wrong”, get frustrated and tap it again. By which time the phone has started to respond and that second tap starts some other confusing behaviour.
In fact, a less tech savvy user is likely to be better off with something like an iPhone because it guarantees all of the above will never be a problem. But these are expensive.
It is only a matter of time, though. The Huawei Ascend G300 has a decent sized screen and a decent CPU. This could be the breakthrough phone. If not, a year from now I imagine the situation will be greatly improved.