I was driving in North Devon at the weekend. I thought London was bad for pointless speed cameras, but at least they’re merely pointless*. The ones out West are positively evil.
Consider, if you will, a two lane A-road through the rolling country hills. Going up the steep hills, an extra passing lane is added to let cars past the slow lorries. You’ve been following a convoy of lorries for six miles, so now’s your chance! You put your foot down: you want to pass all the lorries before the end of the passing lane. But what’s this, right at the end of the lane, just at the point where the two lanes merge into one? Aaaargh, it’s a speed camera!
So now, instead of completing the passing maneuvre safely, you’re forced to transfer all your attention to your speedometer. At the same time as looking at your speedo, you have to merge between two large trucks driving much too close together. It’s evil and it’s dangerous. Just when you should be looking out of your car, matching your speed and position so as to smoothly slot between other vehicles, you’re forced to transfer your attention to the secondary matter of precisely what speed you’re travelling at to the nearest mph.
I’ve seen this trick on the A303, and on urban dual carriageways around Taunton. I expect it is employed elsewhere by Devon police.
Speaking of merging, if you’re joining a dual carriageway from a minor side road and there’s a little slip lane, that’s for merging! That means you use it to get up to speed with the other cars travelling at 70 mph. If there are cars coming, stop at the beginning of the slip so you can still use it for that purpose. Don’t drive to the end of the slip road and then stop. That would be foolish, like the fool I saw doing just that on the A303 the other day.
And another thing about merging: if by some cataclysmic spasm of stupidity you find yourself stopped in the middle of the motorway slip road joining the M5, don’t just sit there with your right indicator flashing as cars swerve every which way to avoid hitting you! Pull onto the hard shoulder and use that to accelerate and merge. I know the hard shoulder is just for emergencies, but such a monumental failure to merge properly is an emergency.
(That pun really wasn’t intended, but it’s quite a good one nonetheless, don’t you think?)
* And a bit annoying. (And a bit dangerous when they cause all the otherwise free-flowing traffic to bunch up.)
Merging:
Possibly these dimwits are less of a menace than the “I’m coming through ready or not” brigade. They don’t seem to realise the people changing lanes for their benefit is a courtesy and not a human right, many times it’s not possible to move over. More than once I’ve had to throw on the anchors to avoid colliding with this mobile menace.
PS the sky is grey! Here, today, anyway.
What about the moron’s who refuse to respect your (or anyone else’s) breaking zone (or even give themselves one)?
Last bank holiday the gf and I went to Hunstanton. As seems to be par for the course for the parts of this country without motorway access, there’s also a dearth of dual carriageway and plenty of people driving caravans, tractors or just generally inclined to drive 10-20 mph below the speed limit despite perfect driving conditions.
So naturally, as soon as I hit one of the extrenely infrequent bits dual carriageway first priority is to get past the snails. Unfortuantely Mr Golf GTi coming up from a quarter mile behind also has the same plan. Only he’s going 90 easily by the time he catches up to me (after some rather dubious weaving in and out of the traffic behind me – yes I do acutally use my mirrors while driving, but that’s another rant entirely).
So needless to say, I’m sat there doing 70 with Mr Brain-Dead barely a cars length behind me. I’m now torn between trying to find a gap in the left hand lane to pull into or staying put and (unwillingly) saving moron boy from a speeding ticket if there are any cameras about. Unfortuantely there aren’t any suitable gaps to pull into without chopping off other peoples (and my own) breaking zones, and the few gaps there are are so small there’s a good chance of getting Montoya’ed if I pull into them.
So I end up driving what must be the best part of 3 miles praying that none of the cars ahead decides to pull out suddnely requiring me to slam on the breaks and that I’m not too busy monitoring moron-boys distance behind me at the precise moment that happens. Thankfully I get to the following roundabout intact and moron boy speeds off at over 70 towards some local town so that he can join the queue of static in town traffic a lot sooner.
Mark: you’re quite right, of course. Merging is all about matching speed and lining up with a suitable gap. Many peopl seem to lack the skill.
Cerebros: In general I don’t have any problem with people speeding, but tailgating is just rude. Flashing my brake lights at tailgaters often works quite well, I find.
My favourite pet hate is the guy who thinks that the generous distance I leave between me and the car in front is an invitation to pass me on the inside and slot into the gap. That’s queue jumping and most un-British; such drivers do not get treated with coutesy.
Rob, agree with what you say, except on one point: if it is possible for someone to pass you on the inside and then get in front of you, it should be a clue you should have already moved into the inside lane. I can accept that in all cases, it is not appropriate, but I’ve lost count of the number of outside-laners who drive like they might catch the dreaded Lurgi if they should move out of “their” outside lane.
Hah. Hahahah. Whee!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/devon/4383188.stm
Driving the Land Rover, I sometimes get people undertaking me when I’ve moved out to let them onto the motorway; my signalled intent is to move back into the inside lane as soon as I am safely clear of them… If they move into my blind spot – and it’s quite a large blind spot on the 110 – it creates a serious hazard where they’re more likely to suffer than me.
Had a corker this morning – someone pulled out in front of me in a 40 zone without enough room; then proceeded to do 25mph, stamping on the brakes and giving me V signs all the way. Yes, I had ended up closer than I wanted to be (about 1 1/2 car lengths) – because they had obstructed my progress on the carriageway. People behaving like that start me believing in involuntary sterilisation. Quite apart from anything else, forcing a LR behind you to do emergency stops in the rain strikes me as a variant on Russian roulette…
I can’t agree, Jim. If I’m in the outside lane it’s because I’m overtaking. Normally I will expedite this but I can’t go faster than the car in front. If someone can pass me on the inside and get in front of me, it’s because they have no concept of safe following distances. The reason I can’t move into the inside lane is that that will put me too close behind the car in the inside lane!